Happiness Isn't Just a Mood

Yesterday morning, my dad and I woke up early to go hit some balls at the driving range.
That afternoon, I went job searching and grocery shopping and joke making with my mom.
Last night, my little sister and I stayed up past her bedtime watching The Incredibles, and then she came and slept in my bed for a little while.
A few minutes ago, I took my dog, Mocha, out to the front yard, grabbed the hose, and soaped her up for a bath.

Amidst these things, I had a very disappointing experience with a few of my friends.

Thankfully, I remembered something someone a lot smarter than me (Madisen Kuhn, thx) once said: "I could’ve let myself be bummed out all day, but I consciously decided to be joyful and stay hopeful instead of letting my mood depend on the crummy things... You can’t let your circumstances define who you are. Life is rough sometimes. Smile anyway."

Happiness isn't just a mood. It's a conscious way of life, and it's hecka better than the alternative. I suggest you try it sometime.

Friends

On January 21, 2012, I wrote a thing.

Friends are what gets you through. They distract you from thinking too much or too deeply, and they make you laugh. Now, I'm meaning true friends. Not like your ex-boyfriend who says you'll "stay friends" after the break up, I mean come on. Be real. I'm meaning real friends who you can be totally retarded around. Who can tell when you're having a crap day. Who can cheer you up with just the right thing to say or do. Those kindsa friends. Don't lose them. Because they're hard to find. It's hard in general to find people who give the slightest care about you, and that makes true friends all the more important. Love them, because you don't know when you'll lose them.

And today on July 25, 2014, that's still very relevant.

Stars

Why do we wish on shooting stars?

They are dead-- huge, falling, bundles of flaming gas. How do they provide such hope? Humans have always been capable of incredible amounts of infinite hope. I had hope in you and me. Now that hope is dead, and it looks more like a huge, falling, bundle of flaming gas than the beauty of an acclaimed shooting star. 

what i want to be

mermaids vs. sirens

beautiful, mysterious, intriguing

luring sailors to their ultimate death

with the sweet lull of their mesmerizing voices

singing of hope, love, desire

only to deliver none of the above promised

For Me

God creates lightning storm sunsets that can't be captured by a camera to show me that He's bigger.
This storm is for me.
His love is the only love that can ever suffice, and my cup floweth over.
He's putting on a show for me, flaunting all the beauty that He knows I love.
The sky is on fire with lightning tears and a steady thunder as background music for the rain's reckless dance.
God knows I need this beauty right now.
And as the red sun falls, the peace of night covers me with His loving whisper.

Writing from the School Bus

Writing from the school bus hopelessly trying to divert myself, getting lost in the lyrics and thoughts, noticing my handwriting suffering from the bumps and turns, noticing my thoughts getting jostled with each reckless move as well. Nobody notices my pencil glide across the page, creating rhymes with snide. Nobody notices me raise the volume ever so slightly in my headphones. People don't notice much but themselves. They're lost inside a pretend conversation and a fake reality; all while I stay lost in my mind, creating bittersweet, secluded worlds on the blank of a page in the crevice of my mind. It's so easy to get lost, but how difficult is it to find yourself within it all?

Realization

I think people say

"If you love someone, let them go"

Because once you do let them go, you realize how you actually can survive without them, and you might even be okay. You realize that you really didn't even love them in the first place, and once you let go, you're no longer holding yourself back. You realize that being independent can have its benefits, and

You are stronger than you realize.